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[evite]

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[kgbs]

[ the honest answer is ridiculous. ]

Because that is where I will be while I wait for you to finally come back. Once I return there, at least.

[evite]

you do know we have a bed, right?

[ questionable choices you're making there, comrade ]

[kgbs]

I am aware.

[ he's frowning at his phone right now. ]

Am I not allowed to wait for you on the sofa?

[evite]

it's pretty weird that you won't sleep in our bed, illya

[ there!!! "our"!!! ]

plus, the couch sucks
you'll get a crick in your neck

[kgbs]

[ this was the weirdest, most domestic sort of argument ever. ]

Why is my sleeping on the sofa such a point of contention? It would not be a permanent thing. I'd go to the bed when you got in.

[ the sofa was fine, his neck was fine, why were you arguing this? ]

[evite]

why do i have to be there for you to sleep in our bed?

[ why are you still acting like it's a hotel room you haven't paid for, you weirdo ]

[kgbs]

Why are you so against me waiting for you to come back on the sofa?

[ what was this argument even about? ]

[evite]

what normal person sleeps on the sofa instead of their own bed?

[ russians being stubborn ]

[kgbs]

I suppose I am just not normal.

[ as if that was news. ]

I'll be on the sofa.

[evite]

i'm throwing the sofa out

[ you're the worst ]

[kgbs]

I will sleep on the floor.

[ you weren't doing anything while you were always working late. ]

[evite]

you will not

[ don't insult her hospitality ]

[kgbs]

I will so.

[ hospitality like he is a guest. ]

[evite]

[ throws hands!!! in the air!!! ]

you're impossible
what do you have against our bed anyway?

[kgbs]

Nothing.

[ the bed is perfectly fine! ]

I have slept in it before, I will sleep in it again. Falling asleep on the sofa is not going to change that.

[evite]

it's weird

[ sorry this is her hill to die on ]

you act like you don't even live there

[kgbs]

Is this really something you want to talk about while you're working?

[ a v o i d. ]

[evite]

we're already talking about it

[ and she's v good at multitasking ]

[kgbs]

I live there.

[ see, everything was fine. ]

We can cease talking about it now.

[evite]

good
then sleep in your own bed and stop sleeping on the couch like you're some exiled boyfriend

[kgbs]

Or what?

[ she was so going to find him on the couch tonight when she arrived. ]

[evite]

or i'm going to think you really want to be some exiled ex-boyfriend
and that's really going to put a kink in my plans for after work

[kgbs]

I just do not understand why this is so offensive to you. That I cannot wait on the sofa while I read or watch television. And if I happen to fall asleep, still waiting for you, why is that so bad?

[ it doesn't sound bad to him. ]

[evite]

because purposefully sleeping on the couch or the floor is very different than accidentally falling asleep watching tv
and between the two of us, you're not the one who accidentally falls asleep

[ IT'S HER, REMEMBER ]

[kgbs]

But it is not out of the question that I would especially if you are very late.

[ he does sleep, daisy. ]

You are making a lot of incorrect assumptions here.