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[evite]

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[shield]

Technically my measurements were taken by an artificial intelligence named after Tony's childhood butler via 3D holographic imaging...

[ Robots have eyes too. ]

Okay, maybe I was asking the wrong question. I should have asked what's your plan for quaking your way out of a supermax prison that's almost fully submerged in the Atlantic without drowning yourself and everyone else inside?

[evite]

okay, humblebrag hubert

[ she still hasn't met any of tony stark's robots and she's bitter af about it. ]

my first plan was to hack the white house wifi and issue a presidential pardon via twitter
plan b is to ask natasha to break me out
plan c through y involve variations on 'seduce guards, steal ships'
plan z is the captain america appeal to public decency, but i'm saving that for last on purpose

[shield]

I can't tell if I'm more offended by plan B or plans C-Y.

[ Did Natasha break four prisoners out of the Raft armed with nothing but a sassy attitude? ]

[evite]

if i used you for plan b, it would just turn into plan c anyway.

[ not that she'd say no to natasha. quake/black widow is a popular tag for a reason!!! ]

we're breaking for recess soon anyway, think you can hold off on your sanctimonious finger shakes until then?