you drink milk and put extra salt on your potatoes, you don't have a hangover. you did something dumb as hell and whacked your head, it's the stupid fake name club way.
[ she is technically a member, as the agent formerly known as skye and mary sue poots ]
what do you have against kurt russell if it gets you to leave me alone for 24 hours, fine i'm just sticking inside for today, catching up on shit sleep i already got someone to check it out
are you sleeping on the floor because you know the couch here is pretty comfy. and there's a hot tub, if you gave yourself a bunch of bruises being a dumbass in some top-secret way.
i'm not getting in it with you before you get any weird ideas.
i didn't mean generic sexual facts, i meant i could tell you about my sex life. god, bob, get with it.
[ so dumb. ]
no lectures today. i have a headache from getting my head sliced open and i'm almost out of ice cream. gonna have to do a room service call soon. you want anything?
bobert would probably be worst, huh? i could tell you about the time i almost got us kicked out of a sushi restaurant.
[ illya is going to kill her. ]
you can come over for the bajillion cable channels and swank views if you're not into free food, too. i could probably also use company that isn't the tv.
[ makes sense. there were two peters for a while. the multiverse is wild. ]
send me your location, i'll send you a cab. and when you get here, you can tell me what you want to go by, because i'm not calling you thing 1 and thing 2.
[ he's not gonna dignify that with a response. not least because his head hurts and it's harder to be snarky when you can't think straight.
but hey, eventually, he's gonna make his way there, with his hood very definitely pulled up over his head, and some shitty sunglasses on because light sucks. ]
[ luckily for bobby mason jason junior todd, the shutters and blinds in daisy's apartment are also shut. brain surgery did a number on her head, and one of the still-persistent side effects has been a particularly nasty reaction to bright lights.
so, she's basically sitting in the dark, in a blanket fort, watching some projected reality tv feed on a wall in her living room and trying not to hate the fact that she's not allowed to get up.
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you did something dumb as hell and whacked your head, it's the stupid fake name club way.
[ she is technically a member, as the agent formerly known as skye and mary sue poots ]
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your dumb fiancee gives me milk.
i spent the first 12 years of my life hanging out in a bar.
hangovers aren't new
also stay mad about my name
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[ he's just russian. ]
i mean, shitty life story aside, you're not exactly hulking out. it's how he shows he cares.
[ which, you know. weird, unfamiliar thing for the kids who grew up in garbage foster systems, but she's had time to get used to it. ]
your name is ridiculous and you know it, and you also didn't argue about hitting your head so i know you're right.
how bad is it?
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if it gets you to leave me alone for 24 hours, fine
i'm just sticking inside for today, catching up on shit sleep
i already got someone to check it out
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[ does she need a better reason ]
are you sleeping on the floor
because you know the couch here is pretty comfy. and there's a hot tub, if you gave yourself a bunch of bruises being a dumbass in some top-secret way.
i'm not getting in it with you before you get any weird ideas.
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and i'm not sleeping on the floor
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[ he gets ONE warning ]
do you want to come over? i did a gig for one of the taxi companies, i have a bunch of credits.
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also no, not in the mood to get lectured about jobs
or other bullshit
or be given milk again
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[ so dumb. ]
no lectures today. i have a headache from getting my head sliced open and i'm almost out of ice cream. gonna have to do a room service call soon.
you want anything?
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also, daring move. assuming i'm not gonna get off on that shit.
but don't, seriously. it's weird and head, hurting, etc.
do i really have to go over for free food?
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i could tell you about the time i almost got us kicked out of a sushi restaurant.
[ illya is going to kill her. ]
you can come over for the bajillion cable channels and swank views if you're not into free food, too. i could probably also use company that isn't the tv.
[ is that.... vulnerability??? honesty??? ]
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look, my name's jason.
[ there's a beat, he really has to parse this ]
i'd protest more but fuck it, i'm hungry
and if you're offering a way to get there, fine
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[ makes sense. there were two peters for a while. the multiverse is wild. ]
send me your location, i'll send you a cab.
and when you get here, you can tell me what you want to go by, because i'm not calling you thing 1 and thing 2.
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[ but he will sent her his location. he actually, legitimately was at the apartment, trying to sleep off his headache. ]
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[ 🙃🙃🙃 ]
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it's on the way
[ give it, like, two minutes ]
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[ yep, that's all she gets to that ]
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but hey, eventually, he's gonna make his way there, with his hood very definitely pulled up over his head, and some shitty sunglasses on because light sucks. ]
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so, she's basically sitting in the dark, in a blanket fort, watching some projected reality tv feed on a wall in her living room and trying not to hate the fact that she's not allowed to get up.
you know, except for necessary emergencies. ]
ps door's open
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